Tuesday, December 28, 2010

...People still freak out over snow storms...

I don't know if you had an experience like this, but I assume that the majority of you have experienced a snowstorm as the vast majority of my readership is in New England...Thanks to facebook....(though I really shouldn't assume this as people from other parts of the world might read this at some point...so...if you don't get snow, haven't experienced a blizzard or are offended by snow....look away?)

Where was I....OH right the snow storm. Well working off of the logic that I have now alienated, or at least temporarily driven away everyone who doesn't get snow, the REST of you (all 4 of you still reading....) have likely lived through a major snowstorm of some sort. Do you remember what that feels like? Especially when you were a kid? A snowstorm meant excitement. Playing outside, snowball fights, snow angels, snow forts, snow-people (don't wanna be sexist now....), all great things. When you were teenagers, it meant time off of school, sledding, skiing/snowboarding, exciting adventurous types of activities. Well I never realized this until this year, but for your mom and dad, all those years New England opted to dump a ton of the white powdah (NO NOT COCAINE!) on us, well those snow storms apparently inspired sheer and utter terror in our parents.

Yep you read that right. As I (even now as I'm reaching the tender age of goddamn 23) immaturely contemplated the numerous fun things to do in the snow, my parents, (my dad specifically) seemed to have a much more...apocalyptic view of the weather. As the sky darkened during the morning of this past Sunday, my father paced around the house nervously. He checked and rechecked the fridge, as if to make sure we would have enough supplies. At one point, he even suggested going out to the grocery store to stock up and make sure we had enough. How much snow were we due to get? 15". That (my dear mathematically challenged readers, is just a little over 1 foot). I've lived through worse blizzards than that in my lifetime....specifically the 1993 "Storm of the century". (when it's got a name like that, I imagine it being shouted in that super cliche way...you know with the deep voice and the bellowing echo that follows? Yeah that)

For those of you who don't quite remember, that storm (while it didn't hit Boston all that hard) dumped 20 inches of snow in Worcester...Not all that bad right? Well we weren't hit the hardest. Boone, North Carolina got 33 inches, Lincoln New Hampshire got 35, and Snowshoe (ironyyyyyyy) West Virginia got 54 fucking inches of snow! Even Birmingham Alabama, who normally gets a measly inch of snow got a massive 17 inches! Just look at this radar map. The storm looks like a goddamn Alien mating forcefully with the ENTIRE eastern seaboard!

Well this storm, though FAR less powerful and thus FAR less interesting, had apparently worried my dad to the point of genuine concern. I don't know what kinds of thoughts were going through his mind...becoming stranded from humanity in our household, running out of food, losing power and heat, being forced to resort to eating pets and cannibalism before slowly dying of hypothermia....probably something like that...

Well if a stupid little snowstorm is enough to freak adults out that much, I don't think I ever want to grow up (and so far...I'm on track :P )

...And that's what I learned today.


  1. I made a snow kitty. Mow, mow.

    -ANONYMOUS. But not really.


  2. Oh, come on, anyone could get that one, Gary.

    -ANONYMOUS. Yes really.